The point.

My mind has become locked in a neverending loop. It began with the question “what is the point?” Would that this question had never occurred to me…

Point. Purpose. How can you define these words, or convey these concepts? It seems to me that it is impossible to do so without referring to them. In other words, the ideas have no meaning without some preexisting assumption of some overall point.

I do not like to assume anything. Anything built on an assumption has a nasty way of crashing to the ground just when you think it’s getting started.

And so here I am. I’ve been fruitlessly searching for the point for so long that I am forced to conclude that it does not exist. And yet this does not stop me from searching.

I have wandered in search of the light for many years. And it has only gotten darker. So I wonder if there was ever light in the first place. Any direction I look seems brighter than here. But as I try to reach a brighter place, it only grows darker.

So do I keep searching, and grow a little less sane every day? Or stop searching, accept the darkness, and give up any hope of ever seeing the light?

I keep searching…for now.

~ by lostinthedark on May 15, 2008.